'When a flower wilts, you don't blame the flower but the environment!' By Lucy Fell
One every parent and their late teen/early 20s should read!
In 2021, I graduated from school and decided to leave home for university. I was convinced I would discover myself, make lifelong friendships, and create memories I’d one day share with my kids. That had been my dad’s reality, so naturally, I assumed it would be mine too.
However, once I moved away, I soon figured out it wasn’t for me. I felt so confused because it seemed as if everyone around me had fit in so well. They fell in love with their degree, made tight knit friends, and had it all worked out - While I most definitely didn’t. I was way behind in assignments, hardly turned up to classes (sorry mum & dad), and spent most of my time by myself at my uni accommodation. The gap between the average UQ student and myself felt vast.
Fast forward to now, I look back and cringe at how much I was comparing myself, and how much time I wasted feeling so confused as to why something everyone else seemed to love, didn’t love me.
But, Tulips don’t bloom in heat, and Sunflowers don’t bloom in cold.
Why did I assume that everyone could thrive in the same environment? There would have been many others like myself feeling lost and trying to force themselves into a narrative that didn’t suit just because it seemed to be the “right” one.
The same goes for jobs. I could never work in a high-pressure corporate job in the middle of New York, constantly racing against deadlines and trying to please top-dollar clients. But for some people, that chaos and constant motion might be exactly what they want. I could happily work in a cosy café tucked away in the corner of a bookstore. Others would find the smell of old pages and slow paced days unbearable. The point is, it’s important to find the environment in which you can truly bloom, or else you risk slowly wilting away and losing your vibrant colours.
I am very happy I tried university and figured out it wasn’t for me. The experience fostered growth and further understanding about myself - what I like, and don’t like. Pushing something that doesn’t fit always ends in disaster, but you wouldn’t know to steer clear without that experience. Self-discovery is key for living a life for yourself, and I am grateful for the lessons it taught me.
Andy adds: This brought a tear to my eye and I questioned myself regarding how I missed the signals. However, I did and as you can see, she is discovering her own journey on her own terms. I am super proud of Lucy, her writing and her passionate desire to live life on her terms. Next stop - Banff, Canada.